This was always the first reaction I received when I told someone my plan for an at home birth in a birthing pool. Sometimes it would be followed with a “cool” or “interesting,” but more often than not, I was regaled with stories and facts on how terrible, painful, and horrifying birth actually is. But my decision had been made, and their words literally rolled off me.
Our son is a miracle himself. After being told by a fertility specialist that my husband, Patrick, and I would never be able to conceive without the help of fertility drugs or IVF, we thanked him for his time and resigned ourselves to adopting a child as soon as we had saved enough money. I will never forget the taste of those tears or the way they burned going down my cheeks on the ride home from the doctor, as Patrick tried to comfort me. My dream of carrying my own baby had been dashed against the rough carpeted floor in his office, and I felt that hurt completely.
Many women ask the question, "When is the best time to discuss my birth plan with my care provider?"
The answer is always "NOW."
Your care provider is the one providing the care for your pregnancy and birth. Before signing on as their client, whether they are a doctor or a midwife, you should feel comfortable and confident that the options and choices you have in your birth plan will be available to you. This can only happen when the lines of communication are open and flowing. Waiting to discuss your choices until later in your pregnancy is not a recommended decision.
When choosing a care provider, bring your birth plan. If you do not have a plan yet, bring a list of things that you want to discuss and know more about for your pregnancy and birth. These lists should be part of the decision for any family. A mother and father have the right to decide the care they will receive, and most providers are open and willing to listen and discuss your options. If something in you...